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David Tan
Faculty of Engineering on exchange at George Washington University (GWU), Washington D.C.
Source: IRO StepOut Newsletter August 2012, Page 4
My seven months on SEP was a transformative time for me. As I met people from many different cultures and countries (apart from having fun by the truckloads), I began to see life from so many different perspectives.
Living in Washington D.C., the transit lounge for international students, I gradually learned that every single individual and his/her beliefs – both the good and the destructive, mine included – are a product of his or her society. This trip taught me that some of the beliefs I hold on to, can and should, be constantly re-thought, edged and sharpened.
David (1st from right) with friends
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To use a simple example, I learnt that interpersonal relations do not haveto be exploitative. It doesn’t always have to be a question of “What’s in it for me?” The people I met on road trips, in classes, in my residence, are nice simply because being nice just makes the world a better place. We are all individuals on a journey towards a better tomorrow, so why not build the relationships we have with people rather than use them?
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On the academic front, GWU showed me the endless possibilities of those ninety minutes in the classroom. It was a Yes-and- culture rather than a No-but- culture. When someone says something, rather than jumping to disagree – which for some reason happens quite often in Singapore – the professors and other students respect the opinions of others. They would see the other person’s angle, and add in their own opinion thereafter. With a culture that affirms while encouraging diversity of opinions, more people speak up over time, and the possibilities and ideas unleashed are endless.
David with his colleagues at a trade and consulting firm in Washington D.C.
My classmates were not afraid to voice their opinions, because there was no notion of ‘making mistakes’. After all, what is wrong with voicing your beliefs if you believe in them? My hope is that our education system will create space for affirming our young people so that we will stop perpetuating this culture of telling people they are wrong, only for the sake of keeping them in line with the break-neck syllabus speed. The fact that affirmation can bring out the best in people is one of the biggest lessons I learnt.
What I would share with future SEP students is to go in with an open mind. Do something you wouldn’t normally do. Talk to a stranger, play dominoes at a nursing home, put some grease on your burger, dance with some friends. If you would never do it, do it. This was what I did, and it was tremendous.
During my 12-day Spring break across 5 cities, my mind was constantly thrilled from unexpected conversations from the first plane ride, to making friends at the hostel, watching gigs featured in the local papers, and the list goes on.
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I’m generally an introvert, but these trips made me realize what I have been missing out on from looking inward too often. As I met people from all over the world, I realised that judging myself against the illusive benchmark of “perfect English” was irrelevant! As I met people from Ireland, Poland, China, and Italy, I realised that their English was not “perfect English” too (if there is such a thing). As I gradually stopped judging and started affirming both myself and the people I met, it was no longer “me vs. you” or “me vs. them”. It became “us” vs. all the things life throws at us. I would have never learnt this if not for SEP.
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David and friends on Capitol Hill celebrating US Memorial Day
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